“Did I miss anything? Have I forgotten to note down stuff I need to do in my planner?” I’d constantly ask myself these whenever I’m not busy on weekends. Does this happen to you, too?
I’ve become accustomed to being stressed, pressured, and agitated on Saturdays and Sundays because I (usually) have a pile of book chapters to read and papers to write. Yesterday (and today) I browsed my actual planner, as well as the app from my phone, to make sure that I don’t have anything to do or submit later this week. And there’s none.
(Well, there’s one thing, but it’s a group thing. Nothing to be stressed about.)
While most people would rejoice over this, I think I’m going to freak out because I’m almost absolutely sure that I have to do something school-related today. I just don’t know what it is because I might have forgotten to write it down.
Just last week, I asked the universe to give me a “chill week” — one that doesn’t need me to stay up all night writing, one that doesn’t involve me running around the campus to get things done. Now that I think it has come, I kind of miss the buzz? Sure, I’d feel extra tired after doing whatever it was I needed to do but at least I feel productive. It makes me feel like I’m going somewhere, unlike today, I feel like I’m missing an important chunk in my system.
(Didn’t I really forget anything? Papers? Readings? Quizzes? A N Y T H I N G?)
It’s funny how things work this way.
When we’re busy, we’d start talking about nice it was when we aren’t doing anything. On the other hand, when we run out of things to do, we’d talk about how bored we are.
Here’s a couple of icon thingies I made for Dianne.
(See the original post for more info.)
Aren’t they pretty? These awesome things (what are these things called?) were made by my sister with Adobe Illustrator.
The main attraction here, I think, are the eyebrows because anyone who has lived with me for at least ten years knows that I value my eyebrows more than my life. Not even kidding.
(written on Thursday, 20 August)
I don’t feel like myself today.
Wait, no, actually I haven’t been feeling okay since Monday.
There’s no other way I could describe what I’m feeling. I have this gaping hole in my chest, but it’s not related to heartbreak. Heh. It feels as if I left my soul in Manila. (Kind of a weird thing to say, I know.) Being surrounded by the old, grimy buildings covered with graffiti; seeing actual homeless people and street children surrounded by boxes of stuff and whatnot; was probably the universe’s way of slapping me with the awful reality of things.
Looks like it’s time for me to grow up.